I tell ya what....
Everythang's goin' to hell in a handbasket.
Lookit everythang goin' on in this hear country:
Them there crackpots all over. Yew won't find them in these hear parts. But they's crackpots. Deemocrats, queers, bums, single fellers and gals, women who think they got a head on they shoulders, dopers, fellers who ain't behind the guns, people who ain't married by the time they 18....they's a lotta crackpots out there.
If you a crackpot and you ain't a redneck, or you ain't behind the redneck, you ain't werth shit.
They's a lot a kooks out there. Them there weird fellers. I hear they's fellers that wear dresses. And hold other fellers hands while walkin' down the street.
If you a kook, you ain't werth shit.
My lands a livin'. Them there whackos just plum stupid. I swan. I ain't never seen none a them weirdos in these hear parts.
Just tried to get my car to start. That there battery's deader than a doornail.
I reckon you best stay in redneck parts if you a true American. If you ain't a redneck, you ain't worth shit.
I'm Woody the Redneck.
WOODY THE REDNECK
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